


Water, Water Everywhere

by Humourtalia



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-10
Updated: 2015-12-10
Packaged: 2018-05-05 22:05:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5392034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Humourtalia/pseuds/Humourtalia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Allies and Axis’ summer get-together turns into a water fight, and when innocent Japan is caught in the crossfire, he decides to seek and get revenge on his attackers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Water, Water Everywhere

**Author's Note:**

> Based on this prompt: http://humourtalia.tumblr.com/post/132693054926/, with a couple extra characters. I never quite intended it to be following Japan around, but that’s how it turned out. It’s set in England’s garden because I've had way too many adventures in English manor gardens, so I know them well.

“Rise and shine!”

It was the first thing Japan heard, his only warning. He was lucky he did not open his eyes sooner, for it was shortly followed by the collision of a water balloon into his face. Japan slowly lifted his newly sodden eyelids, staring across the garden in front of him. His attacker was nowhere to be seen, but left a trail of obnoxious laughter echoing behind them.

Sighing, he glanced to his right. England, their host, was still asleep on his own chair. Their tea had gone as cold as the water that covered Japan. The countries had promised them that their fight would be kept far away, but they’d broken that promise now. Japan silently collected a water gun from nearby and a few water balloons that had been stocked in a bucket. Fully equipped, he headed down the stone steps from England’s patio and onto his lawn. The large, rectangular area had a fountain at its centre – perfect for refilling – and was boxed in by tall hedgerows. That was all - it was no place for war – and so the others had split off, going past the bushes to the gardens beyond. The eastern pathway led to the allotment and walled garden, down the southern path were the fields behind the manor, and to the west was its very own woodland. The laughter and shouts of other countries came from both sides. Japan chose to go west at random, hoping to find his attacker between the trees.

Instead, he found a friendship falling to pieces. Prussia and Spain had backed France into a corner. He was blocked in by overgrown bushes and thick trees, and had to hide behind one of the latter to keep himself dry. His aggressors had ceased firing, but only to conserve water for their final attack.

“We know you’re in there, Francey-pants!” Prussia mocked, creeping further toward his friend. “You can’t hide from us forever.”

France yelped. “This is designer! You can’t get that dirty water all over it! It can only be dry-cleaned!” He begged.

Prussia snickered. Spain turned to him and shrugged sympathetically, but the German rolled his eyes. “Hey, France, if you surrender, we won’t shoot you!” He called out, winking at Spain. The fellow country understood, readying his water gun.

France peeked out, then revealed himself fully, arms raised. He came closer, laying his own pistol on the ground. He stood up again, and the moment he did, Prussia and Spain unleashed their watery wrath. France cried out, protesting against the pummelling he was receiving, but there was nothing he could do. He stopped screaming long before they ran out of water.

“Are you done?” He muttered, defeated.

“Let me check.” Prussia pulled the trigger again, splattering France with the last of his water supply. “Ja, I’m done.” He cackled, and Spain chortled along with him.

“I hate you, I hate you both.” France grumbled, marching toward them, completely soaked.

“Don’t forget your gun.” Spain reminded him. Groaning, France turned around and trudged back over. As he bent down to pick up the pistol, Spain shot him one final time, right on the arse.

“I thought you said you were done!” France yelled, standing up again.

“I was.” Prussia nodded.

“I wasn’t.” Spain grinned.

France fired a few squirts from his gun angrily, but the other two leapt away easily. He was too fed up to actually try for revenge at that moment.

Still seeking revenge, though, was Japan. He passed by the soggy Frenchman on his way into the woodland, coming across Spain and Prussia shortly after. “What happened?” He questioned.

“It’s a long story, involving two water balloons and Prussia’s dignity.” Spain smirked.

Prussia smacked the Spaniard with his gun. “Don’t tell him!” He hissed, before turning to Japan. “I thought you weren’t playing.”

“I am now.” Japan told him. “Have you seen any of the others around here?”

“A couple of the Allies went that way,” Spain indicated a path that led deeper into the woodland. “They were chasing Romano. I’d help out, but…” Spain shook his gun. There was barely a drop left in it.

“It’s fine, I can handle it.” Japan nodded, hurrying on past them. He raced through the woodland, a faint, far away cry his only clue.

“Spain?” The call came again. “Spain, that better be you!”

“Romano?” Japan replied, finding the Italian camped out amongst the trees. He was cowered beside an old log pile, long forgotten by the looks of the moss growing within it.

“Oh, Japan.” Romano whispered, as if he hadn’t just been announcing their location to the world. “Why are you here?”

“Doesn’t matter. Where are they?”

“Ha!” Romano snorted. “As if I know.”

Japan looked about them. If there were any of the Allies hanging nearby, then they certainly weren’t in favour of making themselves known. That didn’t, however, mean they were hiding. Japan finished his sweep of the immediate area, and then picked up a stone. Romano watched him questioningly as Japan looked instead to the trees above, among their branches. He suddenly hurled the rock at one tree in particular. There was silence for a few seconds. Romano was about to ask why Japan had done that, but the stone struck its target. There was a cry, followed by a frighteningly loud thud. 

“My water balloons burst!” A familiar voice complained.

“Was that China?” Romano queried, sticking his head around the log pile to watch the country scramble away, drenched by his own weaponry. “Great, now we just have Russia to worry about!”

“Russia?” Japan turned toward Romano, who screamed. At first, Japan understandably thought it was his sudden movement that had caused the reaction, but when he felt a cold muzzle pressed to his back, he realised otherwise.

“I win!” Russia sang, about to pull the trigger, but he suddenly cried out instead. Japan felt the Russian’s gun move away from his back. When he turned and shot water at him, he saw that Russia himself had already whirled around – to fight off Spain and Prussia. Outnumbered and outgunned, Russia could do nothing but take the soaking. He eventually gave in and trundled off to wherever China had gone. Spain and Prussia shared a casual high-five in victory.

“You have good timing.” Japan told them. “Thank you.”

“No problem, you can trust us to save the day!” Prussia grinned, as narcissistic in victory as he always was.

“Why the hell didn’t you two do that earlier, assholes?” Romano pushed himself to his feet, stumbling slightly as he stood. “Why did you only do it when Japan was here?”

“Because we were getting revenge on-!” Spain was smacked by Prussia again. “Having fun with France.”

“France? France?” Romano growled. “I was out here getting chased around by creepy Russia and China – who can climb trees, by the way – and you were having fun with France!?”

“I must go.” Japan interrupted. “Where are the others?”

“We heard laughter coming from the other side of the garden, you should try over there.” Spain advised, between Romano’s insults.

“Thank you.” Japan hurried away, leaving the woodland as quickly as he could. When he got back to the lawn, he found China and Russia scrambling to refill on water and balloons for their revenge – which would probably be easy to enact, given Romano’s volume – while France was sunning himself and his clothes on the patio. England still slumbered. Lucky him.

Suddenly, Japan heard it. The obnoxious laughter from minutes before. True to Spain’s word, it came from the allotments. Japan raced in, water gun at the ready. The vegetable garden was a maze of plots, intersected by old stone paths and decorated with overhanging trees and rickety trellises. Japan took cover by some large bushes, scouring the area for any sign of his attacker. Concentrating on the garden, he did not notice the figure behind him. Japan realised – all too late – when a hand fell upon his shoulder. He turned to shoot, but relaxed when he saw whom the hand belonged to.

“Germany.” He sighed.

“Japan, what are you doing here?” The German questioned.

“I’m looking for someone.”

“If it’s who I think it is, they’re in the walled garden, messing around.” Germany indicated a confined area at the very back of the allotment. “I suppose you want to attack, or else you wouldn’t be in the game.”

“Hai.” Japan nodded curtly.

“Right. How do you plan to do that?”

“Where is Italy?” Japan asked. Germany sighed, pointing toward a large, decorative urn with his gun. A curl poked out from behind it. Japan placed a hand on Germany’s shoulder to show his appreciation, and then moved toward the urn. “Italy.” He spoke calmly. “I need your help.”

“Why do you need me? I’m just a big pot!” A nervous reply came. “I can’t fight, not even with water!”

“I don’t need you to fight.” Japan muttered. “I need you to help.”

Italy peeked out from behind the urn. “Help?”

The next thing he knew, Italy was running into the walled garden, screaming for his life. He headed right for the decorative maze that was its centrepiece, attracting the attention of the two blond boys within.

The obnoxious laughter sounded again. “Looks like we got a fly caught in our web!” America chuckled. He crept out of his hiding place, startling Italy, who dashed desperately away. He raced further into the maze, searching for a second exit, but had to stop dead when he neared the centre. His path was blocked by Canada. In despair, he turned around to run again, but America stood intimidatingly where he’d come from.

“’Sup, dude?” The American grinned, knowing exactly how this was about to go down. Italy darted away, down the only open path, but ended up in the centre of the maze, completely cornered by the brothers. The pair brandished their water guns toward Italy, while he cowered with his tiny pistol. It might’ve been the end, had this not been Japan’s plan.

“Stop!” A commanding call came from behind. America and Canada turned to see Japan and Germany stood in the entrance to the maze’s centre, guns aloft. Even Italy stood proudly, his gun raised.

“America, put your gun down!” Japan demanded. “I know it was you.”

America’s eyes widened. He leant over to Canada, whispering. “Ha, bro, if you don’t mind, I’m just gonna make like a maple tree and get the hell out of here.”

“What?” Canada whipped round to look at America, but he was already gone. He’d sped away, past Japan and Germany, out of the maze. “Dammit, America!” Canada shouted, albeit quietly.

Japan turned around. Germany noticed. “Go,” He told him. “We’re fine here.”

Japan nodded gratefully, racing away. He’d never done so much voluntary exercise in his life, but it was worth it. He ran out to the main lawn, where America was hunched over the fountain, hurriedly refilling his tank. Japan walked toward him, lowering his gun. He didn’t need it. He wasn’t going to shoot America. No – he was going to push him.

With a tiny smile curving up the corner of his mouth, Japan shoved America with all his might. The American landed with a thunderous splash that attracted the attention of everyone around. Even the still-warring countries came to see what had happened. America sat up, slightly disoriented, as they all stared, taking a few seconds to make sense of the situation.

“Hey…” He muttered, before yelling. “No pushing anyone in the fountain! You broke the rules!”

“I was only giving you what you deserved.” Japan nodded curtly. “You broke the rules when you threw a water balloon at me.”

“Hey, that’s what you did?” Canada suddenly piped up. “You said you were refilling!”

“Not cool, America.” Prussia scolded, having arrived with the others from the woodland. He tossed a water balloon at the already-soaked country - an added insult to his injury.

“Okay, okay, I’m an asshole!” America admitted, standing up. Water drained out of every fibre of his clothing and back into the fountain. “I’m sorry, Japan. I shouldn’t have included you. Using Italy as bait was badass though.”

“Thank you.” Japan finally relaxed.

“So, since we’ve established I’m a complete tool,” America began, using the voice usually reserved for making risky announcements at meetings. “And since the rules have already been broken – twice – is anyone going to judge me if I balloon Sleeping Beauty up there?” He jabbed his thumb toward the patio. Everyone followed its direction, their eyes coming to rest upon the slumbering England. Unlucky him.

\----------

England’s eyes opened slowly, and when they did, they were confused by the sight in front of them. Eleven countries, armed with balloons and guns of all varieties, stood over him. Simultaneously, they raised their arsenal.

“Oh-!” England began, cut short by the absolute storm of watery weaponry that was unleashed upon him. Sopping wet in seconds, he finished his statement. “…bugger.”


End file.
